These links offer video clips of real infomercials for each product. To get the full impact of the revolutionary new contrivances, be sure to watch the clips. Who knows? You may even want to take advantage of the blog entry today and order some merchandise. Caveat Emptor! If you choose to buy, just beware of some of the amazing claims. I can't guarantee any of these products, but I suspect you will definitely get a chuckle from the promotions.
1. Tiddy Bear Comfort Strap
We all know how uncomfortable seatbelts can be and how they often squeeze our frames in sensitive areas. The Tiddy Bear padded seatbelt pad works by attaching to the seatbelt shoulder strap in order to pad it and keep it from digging into the skin. It was invented by a breast-cancer survivor who found her seatbelt uncomfortable after surgery. "My shoulder strap used to pull so tight I could hardly breathe. Now, with the Tiddy Bear, I really enjoy traveling again." (actual quote from a real Tiddy Bear advertisement) One question remains: Will macho men find it acceptable to drive around with a cuddly Tiddy Bear clutching their hairy chests?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HJUBFkVrk9s&feature=player_embedded
2. Kush Support
Many side-sleeping women have to resort to sleep bras with annoying straps and pressure or try holding a pillow between their breasts while sleeping. Gravity is not a friend as it pulls one breast down against the other into an unnatural position. Kush comes to the rescue - it compliments the breasts by keeping them in their natural shape and provides complete breast support all night long. Kush has an anatomically contoured design with a slip resistant surface which is so light and comfortable that users forget it's even there. Kush Bedtime Cleavage Cushion is the creation of CEO Cathinka Chandler, who designed and tested the product over a two-year period with the advice of medical professionals and engineers. She reports its also great for side sleeping during pregnancy, and it reduces cleavage wrinkles and creases.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EbbPYfW2s-E
3. Aspray
A revolutionary formula that safely protects against embarrassing body odors, by neutralizing odor causing bacteria. Doc Bottoms, manufacturer of Aspray says, "It’s that simple … No bacteria … No stink! Ordinary deodorants mask odors and can only be used on armpits and feet. Aspray can be used all over your body and literally stops odors before they start!" Doc claims whether it's stank butt or stank privates, Aspray can stop the odor. Adam Jay Geisinger, a building contractor and inventor of the spray, worked up a sweaty funk during his work day. He looked for an antibacterial product that could be sprayed all over the body, didn't find much, worked with his wife and a "team" that developed a product without alcohol, aerosols or other irritants. The product is licensed and everything. Said to be not just a man's product, "Aspray is safe for all your odor zones." Stinky gals - no cheeky discrimination here.
https://www.buyaspray.com/flare/next?rtag=4aspray&
4. Booty Pop Panties
For years Hollywood stylists have carefully guarded their celebrity’s beauty secrets as if their jobs depended on it! Well, not anymore… Introducing Booty Pop! Now, everybody can have a Hollywood backside that turns heads and no expensive surgery or overpriced trainer is required. Susan Bloomstone, a former PBS television producer, and Lisa Reisler, former Fashion Director (co-creators of Booty Pop panties) say, "Go from FLAT to FAB in just seconds with Booty Pop…Comfortable enough to wear every day…Stunning enough to get notice with every outfit! Jeans... shorts… or even that slinky dress… every booty looks better with Booty Pop!" They're looking forward to expanding the Booty Pop line to swimwear, sleepwear, jeans and sneakers. They even offer buyers a warning: "The makers of Booty Pop are not responsible for all the extra attention you will receive as a result of wearing our product." Available in black licorice or caramel nude.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4EvVErNhVE
5. Kinoki Foot Pads
Formulated in Japan using all-natural tree extracts and powerful negative ions to rid the body of harmful toxins, Kinoki foot pad works are said to work on the principle of foot reflexology. Users simply place the pads on the soles of their feet like big Band-aids before going to bed. By morning the pads will have absorbed toxins accumulated in the body from pollution, radiation exposure, etc., turning the white pads to a shade from gray to black. Ancient Chinese medicine holds that the sole of the foot is the focal point for circulation, so harmful wastes gather in the feet. Said to strengthen the immune system, the pads may turn black with usage but what causes this? The debate is on - water? iron? scam?
http://www.asseenontvvideo.com/648/Kinoki-Foot-Pads.html
6. St Thomas Creations Toilet
Holy mackerel! The St Thomas Creations Toilet with Quattro Flushing technology can flush 2.5 lbs of baby carrots, 4 whole plastic chess sets, 3 lbs of large gummi bears, 18 large hot dogs, 78 plastic letter and number refrigerator magnets, 3.5 lbs of grapes, 20 golf balls and 3.5 lbs of dog food. And, the good news is, this overachiever reportedly uses half the amount of water as traditional 3.5-gallon models. I guess the only question is if the marketing strategy will make consumers' minds jump from expecting the toilet to flush things they would not dump into the bowl to things they always dump.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2zKbJWl9nW4
7. The Goatee Saver
The GoateeSaver Company says, "Being the first to bring men a quality shaving tool they can depend on to help them achieve goatee grooming perfection is something we are very proud of. At the same time, we understand that using a one-of-a-kind product like the GoateeSaver may require a little getting used to." This adjustable goatee shaving template is said to revolutionize shaving and trimming a goatee. The GoateeSaver can be customized to the face in seconds, with three easy adjustments. Users just place the GoateeSaver over their goatee and shave with their favorite razor to get "the perfect look that women will admire and men will respect." This reminded me a little of Hannibal Lecter in Silence of the Lambs.
http://www.goateesaver.com/
8. Poop Freeze and PooTrap
Poop Freeze is billed as "an emergency pet product that every pet owner should have for those occasions in which a pet has diarrhea or loose stool." Claimed to be ideal for new pet owners whose pets are learning the basics of potty training, Poop Freeze is also great for seasoned pet owners whose pets occasionally make a mess in the house. Safe to use both on carpet and vegetation. Just frost & toss stinky pet doo-doo with Poop Freeze. FSI, the makers of Poop Freeze claims it "frosts" poop in order to make it easier to pick-up. This frosting gets rid of most smells right away. What an addition to your pooper scooper.
And, in a related product, PooTrap is an elaborate apparatus that straps to a dog. It holds a bag in place right about where the you-know-what comes out of the you-know-where. One fellow says, "Think about it. If your dog is willing to eat their own crap, this won’t bother them too much. It’s just sort of awkward walking with a bag hanging between your legs. Just ask my grandpa." But, OfPet, manufacturers, claims PooTrap is stylish and fashionable with non-toxic silicone-coated permanent magnets. And, they claim 98% of dogs will get used to PooTrap after they try it for three days.
http://www.viralthis.com/199/poop-freeze.html
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-IrlhLF1c3k&feature=related
I have used all these products and thing all of them were great....though wearing the pootrap was embarrassing when I went to the class reunion...
ReplyDeleteYeah, I know what you mean, Todd. But better safe than sorry.
ReplyDelete