“No one should be alone in old age he thought, But it is unavoidable.”
—The Old Man and the Sea, Ernest Hemingway
The predictable but ever-sustainable loneliness of living is suffered by us all. As we age, we enter a relentless mode of endurance and acceptance of the loss of loved ones, customs, and habits -- all meanings and love gone or substantially altered. These same people and assurances once sustained our vital beliefs and energized our daily interactions. We miss them so, yet learn to keep going forward throughout all adversities We become the victim of invisibility as our manners become outdated. I am not referring just to physical ailments that hamper our live but also to new "cages" that justify no societal value in our aged existence. Faulting or just reacting, people think they "respect" the elderly by simply "talking around them" or failing to be open to justification of their decidedly different minds.
Most of these alterations that hinder our old, vital abilities greatly separate us from the "new." We stubbornly cling to "our old ways" until we become virtually invisible to others because of our great age gap while, at the same time, we simultaneously learn to accept our simple and obsolete, musty presence while fading away. It is as if we occupy spaces and breathe air designed for the new breed, not for us: yes, we eventually all become expendable. And, in its own right, that is good, natural, and essential to the progression of the species. Grief and death simply multiply as we attain older stature.
Still, staying "me" in old age has become my plain, bare anathema -- I see more and more of my contributions as useless dribble. In other words, I am often judged as an "outmoded" person with most of my forthright, candid voice and actions. I am "put up with" as a tolerated obstruction (wink, wink) to progressions of a faster-paced age that files me in the slot of "crazy ass, bumbling interloper ... to ideas? to actions? to progress itself?
How much of this encumbrance is my own perception is debatable.I write to satisfy two truths: (1) my personal experience, and (2) my obligation to positive outside values. I can only write my views to "invisibility" and "loneliness" from my current point of reference at 73 years-old. As examples of benefits to aging, I must confess I try to be more patient, careful, and caring in my old age. For example, I have never regretted apologizing for my thoughtlessness. In addition, I try to atone for my past sins. God grants me serenity and peace for these efforts. I will always be childish in His eyes -- my very humanity still assures me that I will make constant mistakes and misgivings. His power and glory exceed all human understandings. He is the redeemer.
What Research Says ...
We older persons are more likely to live alone and tend to be less socially engaged. A decline in religious involvement is one widely speculated cause that has resulted in a “loneliness epidemic.” Declared as a global epidemic by former U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy , loneliness and social isolation are reported to occur in approximately one-third or more of older adults with 5% of those often or always feeling lonely.
Recent U.S.-based research suggests the range is 17% - 57% of persons experience loneliness, a figure that increases for those who have mental and physical health concerns, particularly those with heart disease, depression, anxiety, and dementia . Loneliness and social isolation have been shown to significantly impact older adults, both physically and emotionally. Areas of the older adult’s life that can be negatively affected when the individual is experiencing loneliness and/or social isolation are listed in the following table.
The long-term (greater than four years) effects of loneliness and social isolation can be even more devastating, including; Increased blood pressure, depression, weight gain, smoking alcohol/drug use, and alone time and decreased physical activity, cognition, heart health, and sleep, stroke and coronary heart disease, in particular.
Table 1
Negative Effects Associated with Loneliness
| • Quality-of-life |
| • Cognition |
| • Subjective health |
| • Stress and depression |
| • Decreased quality of sleep |
| • Disability |
| • Cardiovascular disease |
| • Increased use of health care services |
| • Increased mortality |
| • Institutionalization |
Resources
Christmas days have come and gone
Broken toys and faded colors
Are all that's left to linger on
I hate graveyards and old pawn shops
For they always bring me tears
I can't forgive the way they rob me
Of my childhood souvenirs
[Chorus]
Memories they can't be boughten
They can't be won at carnivals for free
Well it took me years
To get those souvenirs
And I don't know how they slipped away from me
Broken hearts and dirty windows
Make life difficult to see
That's why last night and this mornin'
Always look the same to me
I hate reading old love letters
For they always bring me tears
I can't forgive the way they rob me
Of my sweetheart's souvenirs
[Chorus]
No comments:
Post a Comment