Thursday, May 7, 2009
The Increasing Male?
I'm making this entry primarily for guys. If you are a lady who tends to get a little nervous about the subject of male private parts, skip this blog entry. Warning- Read on only if you wish to examine the ever-popular world of male enhancement. Some of the following content, though humorous, may not be suitable for some people. I have been watching commercials for male enhancement products for several years now. When the commercials play, I cringe-- whether in embarrassment or in unconscious admiration. I don't consider myself a prude, but I have serious questions about something that will make certain parts of my 58 year-old male anatomy rival the Washington Monument. I mean, what are the side effects even if such stimulants do produce monumental (sorry) results? Smiling Dave looks very satisfied in his appearances, but having my entire neighborhood beating down my door to admire a "bigger me" is out of the realm of my imagination. How many times have I heard learned professionals say, "Size is not an issue." Unless I have been listening to those in the wrong profession, I have reservations about the truth of more pleasure as it relates to Willy's increased stature. Believers, however, say the pills will boost size, increase sensitivity and raise sex drive. If a male suffers real E.D. problems, I fully understand the interest in male enhancement, but in most advertisements for the product, I see apparently healthy, fully-charged young adults using the formula. What message does this convey to both men and women about the so-called "necessity" of larger parts? Men, have we been lied to about this subject? First of all, let me inform the reader of some ingredients in some very popular male enhancement products. These products claim to increase Willy's proportions with natural substances that include black pepper seed, ginger root, ginseng extract, velvet deer antler, horny goat weed, pumpkin seed, licorice extract, sarsaparilla, oat straw, and boron. After reading the label on the Internet, I didn't know whether the male appendage is supposed to sneeze (pepper), shed (antler), chew tin cans (goat), wash (boron), or pull up a table at the Tumble Weed Saloon (sarsaparilla). Anyway, swallowing all of this stuff in a pill, along with other things I have never heard of like yohimbe extract, tribulus terrestrius extract, cnidium monnier and xanthroparmelia scarbosa makes me very skeptical of any claims of its absolute effectiveness. It sounds like a hoo-doo science approach with a shotgun delivery. Believe it or not, healthy guys around the world are conducting their own tests of these products by measuring pre and post sizes of their own Willies while using the enhancements. This image of tape measure wielding zipper droppers is more than I want to imagine. What egotist really wants to measure his appendage in the first place? And, if he does, what minute increase is he hoping to find? Also, we all know men are going to inflate unflattering measurements in the first place. And, what happens if a person decides to stop taking the pills? The answer to that is very simple: the manufacturer makes less money. Others seriously want to know if size decreases in increments. If things keep growing while people are taking the pills, enormous (even sorrier) problems could occur also. Also, if anyone with a heart condition takes the pills, do they risk hard (most sorry) times? In all fairness, here, from a female point of view are some testimonials for the product: "A male with a way bigger penis totally has the confidence that he, without any problem, can sexually satisfy any woman properly. And after all, making sex for the man is all about his confidence." "Three weeks after receiving (the product) bottles and giving him 1 pill a day, his passion for me was boosted and it was literally the sex passion of a teenager. We've gone from having sex once every month or two, to once or even twice a day!" After reading these endorsed, actual testimonials, I am thoroughly frightened about male enhancement. In the first place, why would a male want to "sexually satisfy any woman properly"? I don't think most desire to do that. Secondly, if the pills are going to transform me into some insatiable hormone-stuffed teenager who has to take the stage twice a day, I think my lifespan will likely take a nose dive. Turning back the clock is out of the question. So, guys and gals, if you are obsessed with size, maybe these products are your ticket to paradise. Most reports I have heard from reputable individuals deny the guaranteed value of more as being better. According to one comic, "I tried a product for natural male enhancement...it didn't work...so I'm moving to Canada where they use the metric system."
Posted by Frank Thompson at 10:00 AM