“Last March, the New York City Department of Health released its first set of guidelines around sex during a global pandemic – then encouraging citizens to avoid group sex altogether as many epidemiological aspects of the novel coronavirus were still being discovered.
“Now, more than a year later, they are still trying to make that 'virtual hookups' thing happen: 'Video dates, sexting, sexy Zoom parties or chat rooms' are fine options, the agency hypes in its 2021 guidelines.”
(And, all of this despite the fact NYCDH says currently, there is no evidence that COVID-19 can be transmitted through sex. Other coronaviruses have not spread through sex, which leads them to believe that is the case with this strain.)
(Hannah Sparks. “Get ‘kinky’ with our graphic COVID sex orgy guide: NYC Health Department.” New York Post. June 22, 2021.)
The New York City Department of Health encourages people to get kinky this summer. They have released the latest update to the city’s notoriously graphic guidelines for safer sex during the COVID-19 pandemic.
With New Yorkers well primed to engage. (Data shows that 52% of its residents are already fully vaccinated, and 71% of all adults have received at least one dose.), the agency is urging residents to get creative but “play safer” – especially by getting vaccinated before engaging in what some have dubbed the “slutty summer” of 2021.
But the advice goes much deeper and much more graphic.
“Make it kinky,” they suggest. “Be creative with sexual positions and physical barriers, like walls, that allow sexual contact while preventing close face-to-face contact.”
“Kinky” is a gross understatement of the content in the guidelines … and, I do mean gross. For example, the health department writes New Yorkers should …
Avoid sex parties,” but for those who “insist” on getting their groove fully back this summer, the city explains that it’s imperative to get jabbed before you attend “get-togethers with large groups; have group sex, multiple sex partners or sex with people you do not know.”
“Pick larger, more open and well-ventilated spaces” for orgy action.
“Be creative with sexual positions and physical barriers, like walls, that allow sexual contact while preventing close face-to-face contact.”
“Use condoms and dental dams to reduce contact with saliva, semen, or feces during oral or anal sex or rimming.” (Sorry for the offensive content here, but the purpose of this post is to reveal the actuality of the health department's language and descriptive detail.)
Wear a face mask during “parties and other gatherings” and “avoid kissing” as the disease is known to spread via respiratory droplets.
“Masturbate together and use face coverings to reduce the risk.”
“Enjoy sex virtually.” such as “video dates, sexting, sexy zoom parties, or chat rooms.”
“Wash up before and after sex” and “use soap and warm water to clean sex toys.” And, don't forget to “disinfect keyboards and touch screens you share with others.”
(“Safer Sex and Covid-19.” NYC Health. 2021
I guess that about covers everything and much more. But, don't be too quick to develop a sense of sexual security. Now, sexually transmitted diseases are at an all-time high for the sixth year in a row, according to a recent news release by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
What the ???
Despite reports that the frank sexual advice was “just the distraction many people needed as they quickly spread the guide online and shared in a collective giggle over the advised safety measures,” the fact that the New York City Health Department issued the guidelines in such explicit terms (many say a “crude and lewd” description) is troubling. It certainly raises questions about how the tone affects the theme – Covid and STD's are certainly not laughing matters.
Although the guidelines are both timely and helpful, the titillating feel of the release makes one wonder just how horny (or extremely lonely) the authors may be. I mean some of the content is simply overboard, is it not? It's been a long, trying year punctuated by masking, social distancing, and the tremendous fear of social contact. It is good to be lighthearted once more, but just how many people are really getting sex parties or orgies back on their agenda? Maybe more than I can comprehend. After all, this geezer has led a relatively sheltered life. However, I do remember 1967 – the Summer of Love. Maybe 24 years later, Slutty Summer will be another cultural milestone.
"Love The One You're With"
If you're
down and confused
And you don't remember who you're talking
to
Concentration slip away
Because your baby is so far
away
Well there's a rose in a fisted glove
And the eagle
flies with the dove
And if you can't be with the one you love,
honey
Love the one you're with
Don't be angry - don't be
sad
Don't sit crying over good times you've had
There's a girl
right next to you
And she's just waiting for something to do
Well
there's a rose in a fisted glove
And the eagle flies with the
dove
And if you can't be with the one you love honey
Love the
one you're with
Turn your heartache right into joy
'Cause
she's a girl and you're a boy
Get it together come on make it
nice
You ain't gonna need any more advice
Well there's a
rose in a fisted glove
And the eagle flies with the dove
And if
you can't be with the one you love, honey
Love the one you're with
– Stephen Stills (1970)
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